Was Going to be Mad. . . But Then Decided Not To

16-year-old Helena Muffly wrote exactly 100 years ago today: 

Sunday, August 20, 1911: Went to Sunday School this morning. Went over to see Miss Carolyn this afternoon, but she happened to be not at home. I was going to be mad at her for something she didn’t do, but then decided not to. That’s the best way I guess. It wasn’t very much anyway.

Her middle-aged granddaughter’s comments 100 years later:

This is the second time that Carolyn has been mentioned in the diary. She was previously mentioned six days earlier on August 14. I’ve not been able to figure out what her last name was.

We’ll never know what Carolyn didn’t do—and why it angered Grandma. But, I like the way Grandma worked her way through her anger at Carolyn as she wrote the entry.

. . . was going to be angry….but then decided not to…..that‘s they best way, I guess . . . .wasn’t very much, anyway.

I’m not a handwriting expert—but sometimes I can almost sense the emotion from the way certain words are written. It looks like Grandma pressed down very hard when she wrote the word “then”.

Grandma talks about being upset, but the bolded “then” (I think it was written with determination) suggests that Grandma was trying to mentally convince herself that she really wasn’t upset.